Japan has compromised the whole western seaboard...need...countermeasures...
I hear these words from underneath my pillow fort I have built to sleep in, as is my custom on snow days. I hear my wife having a very badly disguised radio conversation with people from her work. Running water doesn't really mask hissing radios and human talking. You would think all that training at the American Espionage Institute would have taught her that. Anyhow, I cant shake the feeling I probably shouldn't have heard that conversation, but now it has peaked my interest. I relinquish rule over my pillow fort kingdom to my dog Fredrick Douglas as I go snooping. I find her laptop and open it. Password protected. I think for a while and then it suddenly comes to me. Of course, the password couldn't be simpler! I type "brodyisthebestever" into the password bar. Denied. Out of ideas and a little hurt, I see Fredrick Douglas peering at be from inside the feather-stuffed gates of the pillow fort. I squint my eyes at him in thought, and type "fredrickdouglas" into the password bar. Access granted, now back to my super sleuthing. I see a folder on the desktop titled "TOP SECRET" and immediately click it. Inside is a document that spells out the whole situation. Masaya Nakamura, founder of the Japanese organization Nakamura Amusement Machine Manufacturing Company, better known as NAMCO, has been secretly developing in his underground laboratory the next installment of the Pac Man series of arcade machines using the latest in brain control technologies. The first wave of these machines have been unleashed in California, infiltrating every arcade and game pub, players everywhere are coming under the suggestion of the game, causing them to take out their life savings in quarters and play the game until they are all gone. Shocked by this new information, as well as the TASR my wife had to the back of my neck, I regain consciousness an hour later. She left for work and took the laptop with her. Great. Good thing I printed a copy. I walk to the printer and take the paper sitting there. Continuing my reading, it seems there is only one way to defeat this threat and free the people who have already become enslaved by the games. To set them free someone has to find the master game machine in Nakamura's lab and beat the 256th level of the game. I am not trained to break into high tech facilities nor am I trained in espionage or any form of sneakery, but I have seen every James Bond movie a thousand times so I think I am more than qualified. I call my best pal Steven Spielberg, who is also the best Pac Man player in the history of existance.
Hey, ever been to Japan?
